Secondary infertility

Over time, we’ve had friends and family ask us if we plan on having a second child. The answer is YES! Lately, I’ve been hearing all about “ideal age-gaps” or how far apart you should space your children, and I know some couples are particular about that. I’ve never been big into it…perhaps because I don’t get pregnant easily. I know that planning simply won’t get me anywhere and will lead to disappointment. For us, when it happens, it happens. Most of my mom friends have already gone on to have multiple children, and lately it’s had me feeling a little left behind. I’m really not sure why! I’m grateful for Cache, and I’ve even told Tyler if more didn’t happen for us, I think I’d be OK.

My fertility journey goes a little something like this: I’ve never taken birth control. I mention this because it further proves my case on how difficult it is for us to get pregnant. I married in 2013, and we decided to avoid any preventative methods. We conceived Cache in summer of 2016. After I birthed Cache, my period came around 8 months postpartum and since then, we’ve never avoided my ovulation. I track ovulation on an app and we’ve aimed for specific days…and we’re 2 1/2 years in not having yet conceived. The rumor about being fertile after your first child is a total myth for me!

I purchased an Ava bracelet a few months ago, tracking my period, ovulation and “sexy times”. Eventually, I got frustrated and stopped using it after two months of no results. I know I threw in the towel early, but sometimes the whole waiting game is overwhelming, and I need a mental break. I do plan on using it again. I like the Ava bracelet and all of the technology it’s able to give you (breathing rate, skin temperature, pulse rate and heart rate all give off indicators of ovulation and fertile window) but I don’t like that it gives me such a LARGE fertile window. I don’t want to know my best 5 days. I’d rather it hone in on 1 or 2 erfect days and say, “THIS IS THE DAY.” I feel like it works just like an ovulation stick only it’s way more money. Anyone out there used Ava?

Apparently secondary infertility is more common than we think, accounting for 50 percent of infertility cases. With my wellness journey really taking off this year, I decided to run some tests and finally look into why it always seems to take us more time. I found an internal medicine doctor to run some labs for both Tyler and me. I like him because he’s all about holistic medicine. Constipated? Drink prune juice. High blood pressure? Exercise. Anxiety? Ashwagandha or medical marijuana. He’s not quick to prescribe medicine and really believes in simple.

First, I started with a spit test (which is $250 out of pocket, by the way). The way it works is you have 4 test tubes. You spit in one tube within 30 minutes of waking up; a second tube before lunch; a third tube before dinner; and a fourth tube at bedtime. You’re not allowed to eat or brush your teeth 2 hours before testing. You also can’t wear any lip products. From there, the kit comes with a pre-made shipping label to ship off to the lab, and when the lab receives results, you’ll schedule a follow up visit with your doctor. Here’s what the kit looks like:

Second, I gave a urine sample. No need for a picture of that 🙂

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Third, I gave 6 vials of blood for thyroid and hormone testing to make sure both check out.

Tyler also gave blood samples and ran some additional labs to measure fertility. And bless his heart! They couldn’t get any blood out of his veins and stuck him 4 times before any success! He was so scarred by the visit and was bruised on both arms for 6 days after!

We haven’t received results back and I won’t be sharing them as I feel that it’s personal information (and it’s not just my results that are a part of the equation) but I wanted to give you an insight on the steps we’ve taken so far in case any of you out there are struggling with the same thing! In a world where it seems everyone blinks and is pregnant on Instagram, I thought it was worth mentioning that some of us struggle. If you do too, you’re not alone!

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